My Paper Heart

So, long time no blog huh. I didn't really have anything to write about before. I'm now in my apartment in St Cloud, have been for almost a week, and it's not bad. It's good cause my roommates are just as slobby as I am, so I don't have to worry about pissing them off with my messyness. I haven't really seen much of my roommates, one of them I haven't actually met yet, but that's ok. I'm ok with being alone, and I kind of prefer it sometimes.

Update on the Travis situation...nothing is happening. I honestly don't get this boy AT ALL. I don't think he's purposely messing with me, I don't think he has a clue what he's doing. I saw him at work today and he barely said hi to me, and it felt all weird and awkward. I don't want things to be awkward with him, he's too awesome for that. I was kinda scared this would happen though. I thought it might be a bad idea to get involved with someone I work with, and I'm not even dating the guy yet and it's awkward already.

I just want to know either yes or no if he wants something beyond friendship, cause honestly right now, I don't know. I really don't care either way, I just want to know. So, I just sent him a text asking him exactly that. It may have been a bit forward of me, but I'm not someone to beat around the bush, I'll just get right to the point. I just hate it when guys are interested in me but are too freaking chicken to act on it. Cause then I feel like there's something wrong with me, like I did or said something to make them distant.

It does kinda of make me a bit upset. I've been single for almost 2 years now, and I know I'm only 21, but I still can't help feel like I'm never going to get another boyfriend. It doesn't really help my self esteem either. And it's really hard, since I'm so shy with people I don't know it's hard for me to actually meet a guy and talk to him and all that. That's why I was so excited when I met Travis as we clicked immediately and he's so easy to talk to. That's why it's weird now, cause he never acted like this before. So I don't know what the hell is going on.

*sigh*

On another note, my new computer rocks! I love it! :)